Luck is an exceptional thing. Some people start companies, and with beginners luck, start making money off the bat. I know, because the first business I ever started made me money off the bat. But it took it for granted, and the business fell. Three other businesses I started after that one were complete flops. First, I would say that I was not passionate about the business. And at the time, passion was the thing for me. I had had some money before, and I realized that money doesn't buy happiness, and so I wanted something more than the money to push me to wake up. Then I started a business I liked but ended up failing, saying that the business model was not working as it should have worked.

Now, I am on the fifth attempt, the third attempt I have skipped since that was like a job. A rich relative had given me a lot of capital to start a business, in which they had 80 percent stake. Although that might have been the most profitable business I would have run, I rarely did anything businessy, coz the relative, being a control freak - like I am, ran the entire show, leading me to give up, coz my soul was worth a lot more than a few millions. Back to my train of thought. I have realized that except for the first business, which was cash flush, and the one started by a relative, I have ended up failing in all other businesses because of anxiety. I might have blamed everything on everything else, but the truth is that I was just emotionally weak to withstand the anxiety that comes with running a business.

Luckily enough, I ended going through the most traumatic experience that anyone should ever go through and it made me as tough as Robocop's nuts. Now, its been a year, I have been drowning in anxiety about paying bills, getting clients, having food, not having my lights turned out, and endless worries, that I have no anxiety anymore. I would say that trauma is a great thing for someone destined for the path of entrepreneurship, but a disastrous thing for someone who will never benefit from emotional strength that comes from overcoming trauma. And when I talk about trauma, I am not talking about the occasional heartbreak that people go through. I mean the kind of stuff that will drive people to kill others or kill themselves. Anyone who's been there understands that.

The dark side of entrepreneurship is the anxiety that you have to endure. Also, the numerous demonic voices always telling you to quit, that you are not enough, that you will never win, like they are on dead ass mission from hell to make sure that you never get to the finish line. What I have realized is that most people do not fail in business because of lack of skills or capital, but because of the lack of emotional strength required to power through the hell maze that is the world or running a business. What's the alternative? Give up on your dreams and end up a bitter man, who takes out his anger on his family and friends. Or who drinks themselves to death, because they did not have the guts to power through the first two or so years of hell?

I think that if you survive the first two years of business, and then learn the necessary skills to power through the other 3 years, you will cross the threshold that 99% of all businesses never get to. And past that point, you have earned your stripes and position to be among the ruling class of the world, if you have the skills required to scale up your business until you get to the very top. But many a man, even the most talented, barely make it past the first year. I would say, that this is the first business I have powered through for the longest, and I feel like I am now in a position to put in another year of uncertainty without as much as breaking a sweat through the process.

And I guess that is the whole reason why people idolize the wealthy. Sometimes, we might hate them because they have what we never did, but then, the upside is that most of us try to be them and fail miserably. And I say that it is not because of lack of talent, intelligence or capital, because although these things help, the ability to live with anxiety and uncertainty for long periods of time is what separates the successful entrepreneurs and the failures. And I might fail, don't get me wrong, but with every business venture I have tried and failed, I learned something about myself and about the path, that makes it easier to push the other business a step further. So power through the anxiety mess, and you will be okay! Peace out!